Is it okay to leave your pet during euthanasia: The Quiet Heartache Behind Euthanasia Decisions

In the tender moments surrounding the end of a beloved pet’s life, guardians often face agonising decisions. One that brings particular weight is whether to remain present during euthanasia. For some, this farewell must happen at a distance, not because they are uncaring, or cold hearted but because the circumstances leave them no other choice.

During lockdowns, clinics were bound by strict protocols. Guardians were barred from entering, left waiting in car parks, clutching a lead or a fading scent, hearts full of ache. There was no dignity in it, no choice. Just protocols and soul wrenching heartbreak.

But even beyond pandemic-era restrictions, there are nuanced reasons someone may not be by their pet’s side in that final breath (they should never be judged):

• Overwhelming emotional distress: Some guardians fear their intense grief will distress their animal. They may step away to let a calm, gentle atmosphere preside.

• Trauma responses: Past losses or complicated emotional histories can make witnessing euthanasia unbearable. Choosing not to stay can be an act of self-preservation, not abandonment.

• Trust in the veterinary team: Guardians may deeply trust that the vets and nurses will hold their pet with love and tenderness. They choose to delegate this sacred task to those they consider extended family.

  
  

We must dissolve the myth that presence equals love. Presence is just one form love can take, but so is making a donation in their name, planting a flowerbed in their memory, or whispering thanks on the walk home.

If you weren't there, you didn’t fail. You made the best decision you could, in the moment you were in, with the heart you had. And your pet felt your love because love isn’t bound by physical proximity. It lingers, it echoes, and it wraps around them even in your absence.

So, let’s replace shame with understanding. Let’s hold space for the full spectrum of goodbyes.

Hand holding paw